I get up in the morning to bring love into even the darkest corners of the animal nature of myself and my clients so that we can become more compassionate, conscious, and free.
I have the sidual of my soul tattooed on my wrist as a reminder to see my life through my soul's perspective, from where I see a deeper meaning within a much larger context.
I have a dream to build and live in a spiritual community. I believe that community is essential for us to remember ourselves as souls, and to ask for help when we have forgotten the way.
I am a Relationship Alchemist, which means that I am supporting a cultural transformation in the realms of relationships, sex, power, and intimacy. I am also a tantrica, yogini, artist, partner, lover, step-mum, or small business owner.
I am partly queer, partly woman, and bisexual - as I am interested in a more holistic, inclusive perspective on life.
My spiritual practices are existential kink, tantra, and studies of hermeticism, mindfulness and other forms of meditation, Buddhism, conscious dance, ashtanga yoga, shamanism, esoteric cosmology, and ‘The Cross’ - a map that works with nonduality and duality, as well as ego, body, and soul.
I have gained qualifications in Relationship Coaching (online with IAP), Systemic Constellations (CSC Center for Systemic Constellations in London), Authentic Relating, Relational Meditation (at ART - Authentic Relating Training), Neo-tantra (Nikkila Temple, Finland), Archetypal Psychology (Caroline Myss), Shadow Work (The Cross, Tak’hi Dyandeepa), Grief Coaching (Sitting With Death and Collective Grief; Rose Diamond), and Trauma Release ([email protected], Trauma Release Exercises). I have also studied in places like Tamera (Community in Portugal), Plum Village (Zen-Buddhist Monestry in France), and Schumacher College (College for Systemic Transition, England).
I believe that love and sexuality are divine gifts and resources for a global transformation from war to peace.
Passionate about climate change and the ocean, I started out as a Marine Ecologist, and worked for an UN-body in the developing world. It was there I began to see the much deeper underlaying problems we were up against on the journey to cultural transformation: sexual violence, patriarchal religion, disempowerment of women, poverty, bribing, political lobbying, mental health, and a disconnection from community and from the Earth. At the heart of this culture we could say, is a lack of love.
What we experience collectively, is also what we experience individually.
On an individual level, this lack of love showed up in some of the following ways: I felt I had to suppress truth and my emotions, limit my freedom to ease jealousy and mistrust, sexually perform in ways that were expected of me, and pretend that I wasn’t bisexual or attracted to other people. I also silenced myself initially in regards to two incidences where I was sexually abused.
When I realized that I shared these experiences with the experiences of millions of other people. I saw that these challenges were caused by a dysfunctional toxic system, which we call patriarchy. This is the birthplace of dominance of masculine values. I stopped seeing my trauma as an individual experience, but instead as a collective one.
I went to places where this trauma is healed in a collective - intentional communities, retreats, workshops, festivals, etc.
I learned that the trauma can be healed, and it is possible to be authentic, liberated, incredibly intimate, and committed in a relationship (my partner Chris on the left). It requires trust and community, even if it’s just as little as one other person witnessing the relationship.
It is possible to heal from sexual abuse and become a multi-orgasmic being.
I wish for every person who is alive and currently able to be turned on by life, and to celebrate that you are one of the people in the world who fully and shamelessly experiences the sexual bliss that is available if you allow it.
"Bibi is a gifted space-holder. The way she works feels very safe, and challenging in the best way. She isn't afraid to be direct, while she is kind and present. I feel more open, honest and understanding of myself.'
Mark Picthall, Photographer
"Bibi offers really incredible tools and techniques that I find really valuable and helpful for relating with my partner and with others. I can highly recommend her."
Dom, EFT Healer and Facilitator